Sometimes you have to
go through the hard times to really appreciate the good. Sometimes you have to
let go of the past before you can make the leap into your future. Last night, I let go.
Taking off the wedding
ring, given to me by my late husband, was liberating in more ways than I could
have ever imagined. It made a far greater
statement than any casual 'I love you' ever could, and it freed me to give
myself completely to Miles.
He woke me, kissing me
softly on my forehead. At first wondered
if it had all been a dream. I looked
deep into his brown eyes and smiled the deepest smile as I realised the dream
had come true. The sun was streaming through
the bedroom window of my Docklands flat, as we lay naked between the black
Egyptian cotton sheets, completely and unashamedly in love.
Last night had been so
crazy. I still found it difficult to believe
that at the age of 18 I was a widowed multi-millionaire, living in a mansion
house and running my own record company.
Last night we'd hosted a charity concert in memory of my late husband,
Simon. Miles's band, Unknown Pleasures,
had been the headline act. It was an
amazing show, but that wasn't even the crazy part!
I felt like I'd
waited forever to be with Miles. Over
the past 4 months I'd been slowly falling in love with him, but his dysfunctional
relationship with Cassandra complicated things, preventing us from being
together. That was until last night, when
she gave Miles the perfect reason to leave her.
Who could blame him? When you catch
your so called girlfriend performing sexual favours in exchange for drugs, it's
pretty much game over.
"I'll go make
that coffee eh?" Miles said, raising his eyebrows. I blushed as I remembered what had happened
last night. When Miles brought me home I'd
put the kettle on to boil, but I never got as far as actually making the drinks. The white porcelain mugs were still standing
empty on the worktop. Miles had proved
too much of a distraction as he kissed me so tenderly on the black leather sofa,
and I dragged him off to the bedroom, where we made love for the first time.
"Coffee can
wait," I said, as I wrapped my arms around him. Miles ran his fingers along my arm. I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck
begin to stand on end. I looked up again
into his brown eyes and thought I must still be dreaming, then my phone started
ringing.
"No rest for the
wicked!" laughed Miles as I dragged myself away from him.
"Me,
wicked?" I asked, pretending to be all innocent.
"You were last
night!" he said, as he reached across, gently slapping my backside. I skipped out of the way and answered my
phone. It was Joolz, just checking in
and reminding me of the work we had to do this morning. We had to clear all our gear out of the venue
by noon so I told her I'd meet her there at 10.
I gazed longingly at Miles stretched out between the sheets. I wanted nothing more than to lay there all
day with, him but this was no holiday, there was work to be done.
"Sorry babe,
we've to get a move on. I'd better jump
in the shower, my hair stinks of stale beer." Miles looked a little disappointed.
"I'll go make
that coffee then, oh and save some hot water for me would you?" he called
after me. I laughed. We'd been together less than 24 hours and
already we were acting like an old married couple.
When I got out of the
shower I found Miles in the kitchen making toast. I couldn't help but think how damn sexy he
looked, standing there in his bare feet, trousers and no shirt.
"I made you
breakfast, Angel."
"Cheers
babe!" I said kissing him on the cheek and picking up a hot buttered slice
of toast.
"Oh, you don't
have a spare t-shirt do you?" asked Miles, "Mine is still damp and
all my clothes are back at the hotel."
I wasn't surprised, Cassandra had given us both a good soaking as she
threw a pint of lager over us last night.
I guess it was only to be expected, she had just found out that I had
stolen her boyfriend and I probably would have done the same thing in her
position. My clothes were still damp too,
but by the time Miles and I got back to my flat, laundry was the last thing on
our minds!
"I might have
something," I said, as I turned and went back into the bedroom. I opened the wardrobe and just as I remembered
there was a pile of plain black t-shirts on the shelf. There were clean socks and boxer shorts on
the shelf below too. They had belonged
to Simon. I had cleared his things out
of my wardrobe at home months ago but I'd forgotten that he kept a few clothes
here too. For a moment I got a little
choked up, but I told myself not to be so silly. Simon was dead, he wouldn't be needing them
again and I'm sure he would have loaned them to Miles anyway.
I made the bed, laid
out the clothes and left out a couple of clean towels too.
"You're in luck,
I found a shirt and some clean underwear for you." Miles looked puzzled for a moment.
"Simon's?"
he guessed.
"Yeah," I
said, turning away. I didn't want him to
see me sad, not when everything had been so perfect.
"Angel, are you
sure?"
"Yeah, of course
I am." I turned to Miles and tried
to smile. "I hope they fit, you're
a bit bigger than he was."
"Oh am I?"
Miles said smirking.
"You have a
filthy mind!" I said, giggling too.
I went over and kissed him.
"Now go on and get in the shower, you stink!"
"Charming! That's the last time I make you
breakfast!" he said laughing as he headed towards the bathroom.
"I hope
not!" I called after him.
I picked up my
breakfast and went to sit on the black leather sofa. As I put my coffee cup down I noticed my
wedding ring on the glass table, right where I'd left it last night. I picked it up and turned it over in my
hands. I almost slipped it back on my
finger but I thought better of it. I was
still technically Mrs. Wetherall but it had been almost a year since Simon had
died and it felt wrong to be wearing it now I was with Miles. I had made the point of taking it off last
night to prove how serious I was about our relationship, I'd be giving mixed
signals if I put it back on now. I
grabbed my handbag and put the ring safely away in my purse. I wasn't going to wear it anymore, but I
didn't want to lose it either.
I drank my coffee and
checked my phone. There were lots of
messages of congratulations after the gig last night. It had been my idea to organise a benefit
concert in memory of Simon, but it was the bands and the staff at Angel Blue
Records who deserved all the credit. Unknown
Pleasures had stolen the show with their headline set. I smiled to myself as I remembered the song
Miles had dedicated to me, and I blushed as I remember how he kissed me in
front of everyone when they came off stage.
I drained my cup and
I was about to go back into the bedroom to finish packing when Miles stepped
through the door, drying his dirty blonde hair on a towel. He was wearing Simon's t-shirt.
"What do you
reckon?" he said, turning around in a circle.
"I think you'll
get away with it," I said, smiling.
As I expected the shirt was a little too small for Miles. The fabric was stretched tight over his muscular
frame and I felt myself getting turned on all over again. I had to resist though, I didn't want to seem
too eager and anyway we had work to do. "Come
on, we have to meet Joolz in 20 minutes."
I was a bit nervous
in the cab going over to the venue. I
didn't know what to expect of everyone after last night, but I shouldn't have
worried. When we got there everyone was
too busy to gossip. We only just got the
vans loaded up in time, but we did our best to be professional. The venue manager said he'd be glad to have
us back again, which was another small victory for Angel Blue Records.
"Angel, we're
getting off now," said Jamie, tapping me on the shoulder. "Thanks for everything, one of our best
gigs I think."
"Yeah it was,
you played a blinder," I said looking over his shoulder, trying to spot Miles. "And thanks for being so understanding,
you know, about me and Miles."
"That's OK. I had a long talk with my sister this morning
and she's admitted she needs help with the drugs and everything. Dad came down first thing this morning and
picked her up so she won't be causing any more trouble for a while at
least."
"I saw what she
posted on Facebook last night," I said, feeling a little guilty.
"She was angry,
but she knows it was her own fault. I
guess it was partially my fault too. I
put Miles in a terrible position, making him responsible for her. I didn't want to face up to what she was
really like. I should never have done
that, and I'm sorry." I really
appreciated what Jamie said, it must have been very hard for him to admit the
blame.
"Hey, it all
worked out in the end," I said. My
eyes lit up as I saw Miles heading towards us.
He gave me a big hug and kissed me on the lips.
"We're going now,
I'll call you when we get back," Miles said. I was sad to see him go but we needed to give
each other a little space, just to figure things out.
"Have a safe
journey!" I said as I kissed him back.
I watched as he climbed into the van and then they drove off into the
city. I stood there grinning to myself,
lost in my own little world when Lora came up to me, waving her hand in front
of my eyes.
"Come on Angel,
we'd best get going too if we're doing to catch that train." I picked up my bags and we headed out onto
the street to hail a cab to the station.
On the train I set up
my laptop pretending to work, but that wasn't enough to stop Lora asking
questions. When Spyder and Joolz went to
get coffee she squeezed into the seat next to me. She laughed so hard when she caught me
staring intently at a blank screen.
"You going to
tell us what happened then?" she asked eagerly.
"I have no idea
what you mean," I replied, trying to keep a straight face.
"Only Miles
never came down to breakfast this morning," Lora said in a sing song
voice.
"Didn't
he?" I said pretending to be surprised, but it was no use. I could feel my cheeks glowing and there was
no way I could hide how I felt.
"Angel? Where's your wedding ring?" Lora said grabbing
my left hand and waving it under my nose.
"I took it off
last night, just before I dragged Miles off to the bedroom."
"Oh my God
Angel! You didn't!
"I did!" I
admitted, blushing.
"And?"
"It was wonderful!" I said blushing even more. Lora squealed and I covered my face with my
hands as everyone on the train turned around to stare at us.
"Shut up
Lora! I don't want the whole world to
know"
"Why not? I think it's brilliant you two finally got it
on."
"Yeah!" I
sighed, "I think it's serious Lora.
He said 'I love you' and I think he meant it."
"Then he's
definitely serious! Did you say it
back?"
"Yes!"
"So when's the
wedding?"
"Lora! I'm not going to marry him! I only just started seeing him last
night! I'm going to take things a bit
slower this time I think, although it's not going to be easy. He has got one hell of a body!"
"Angel!" Lora squealed as the colour came to her
cheeks.
"What are you
two giggling about?" asked Spyder, setting the paper coffee cups down on
the table.
"Oh
nothing," I said, but I wasn't fooling anyone.
"I'm guessing
Angel's new boyfriend," said Joolz.
Lora and I couldn't help but giggle again.
"Come on give us
a break!" I begged them.
"OK, OK, but I
will say one thing. I haven't seen you
this happy in a long time," said Joolz.
"Miles is good for you, Angel.
He's a keeper."
"Too
right!" said Lora in agreement.
"Yeah, I think
he might be," I said smiling. I
leaned back in my seat, drinking my coffee and watching the countryside pass us
by.
I felt like a
different person coming home. In the
grand entrance of my mansion house I was greeted by Martha, the housekeeper,
and my Irish setter, Blue. I hauled my
bags up the wide staircase, closed the apartment door behind me and crashed
down on the sofa as Blue excitedly jumped up and licked my hands. Martha had taken good care of her while I was
away but Blue was always glad to have me home.
I sat up and fussed her, and I let her jump on the sofa next to me.
"Blue, you like
Miles don't you?" Blue tried to
lick my face, which I took as a yes.
"Me too Blue, me
too." I cuddled up with Blue and I
was almost dropping off to sleep when my phone rang. It was Miles.
Instantly I was awake. I was so
eager to see him again but I knew I had to play it cool, I didn't want to put
him off.
"Hi Angel, did
you get back OK?" he asked.
"Yeah, Lora was
fishing for details about last night though." Miles laughed.
"The lads were
pretty much the same, teasing me about sleeping with the boss."
"You told them
we slept together?" I asked, a little shocked.
"Not in so many
words, but they pretty much figured what happened when I didn't go back to the
hotel last night. Anyway, I wondered
what you were doing tonight?"
"I'm shattered,
I was going to crash and watch a bit of telly."
"Oh," said
Miles, sounding disappointed.
"But I wouldn't
mind some company if you want to come over," I said, hoping I didn't sound
too desperate.
"That would be
good. See you in about half an
hour."
Half an hour? I started to panic. Miles was coming over in half an hour and I
was a mess. I hadn't even unpacked my
bags yet. I dashed into the bathroom, brushed
my teeth and tried to make myself look presentable. I couldn't believe how nervous I felt. I tried to tell myself it was just Miles
coming over to hang out for a while, but I was too excited to see him
again. I was determined to play it cool,
things had moved pretty quickly with Simon but this time there wasn't any rush.
25 minutes later I
went downstairs with Blue and let her into the garden. Right on time Miles drove his battered blue Ford
Escort up the driveway and parked it by the front steps. It looked so out of place, a knackered old
banger parked on the driveway of a mansion house, but I didn't care. It was the man inside the car I wanted. I stood by the door and watched him as he got
out of the car. He looked sexy as hell as
he walked towards me. All thoughts of
playing it cool went right out the window, we didn't even have chance to say
hello before we threw our arms around each other. I called Blue inside as I eagerly lead Miles
up to my apartment. We barely made it
through the door before we started tearing each other's clothes off. I wasn't complaining one little bit as Miles
kissed me so deeply and we stumbled into the bedroom.
I'm not sure what
came over me, I'd never felt lust like this before. I couldn't keep my hands off Miles, and the
feeling was mutual. The only time he took
his hands off me was to put a condom on, and that didn't exactly take a long
time. It was crazy but it felt so right
as he held me so tight and fucked me so hard.
Breathless and naked,
Miles left me reeling. I stared at the ceiling and couldn't help but laugh out
loud.
"What's so
funny?" asked Miles.
"Oh nothing,"
I giggled.
"Something I
did?" Miles asked, sounding a little paranoid.
"Well, kind
of. I did a lot of thinking on the train
and I sort of promised myself I'd take things slowly, but we've been together
for less than 24 hours and we've spent most of that time in bed!" I
laughed. Miles pulled a guilty face.
"I'm sorry
Angel, you should have said..."
"Oh no! I don't regret a second of it! I guess I never realised how badly I wanted
you." Miles smiled at me, his brown
eyes so bright.
"I wanted you
too, Angel, ever since I first laid eyes on you." I blushed.
I couldn't forget the first time we met.
"Unknown Pleasures
at the Old Ship. That was the first gig
I went to with Simon."
"Really?"
said Miles, surprised.
"Yeah, I was
just a sweet and innocent school girl before I met him." Miles sniggered. "Seriously! I was pretty boring, I never went out, I'd never
even had a boyfriend before. In fact
that was the night I lost my virginity," I said, blushing.
"Wow, there is
so much I don't know about you, Angel," he said stroking my hair.
"So what about
you? Who was the first girl you slept
with?"
"Ah, now that
would be Chloe," Miles said with a troubled look on his face.
"Go on..."
"That was a bit
of a mistake actually." Miles
didn't seem to want to talk about it but I pressed him further.
"Come on, I told
you!"
"OK, OK. Chloe lived next door to us, she was 15 and I
was just 16. I wasn't really seeing her
or anything but her parents had gone away for the weekend on some darts trip
from the pub, and they'd left her at home with her big sister, Michelle. Anyway Michelle went out clubbing so Chloe
decided to have a party. She invited me
and some kids from school, we ended up raiding the drinks cabinet. We all got a bit wasted and this lad, Steve,
was trying it on with her, but she got all upset and ran off upstairs. I went to try and calm her down, but when I
gave her a hug she kissed me and, well, we didn't stop."
"Oh wow, so did
you start going out with her then?" Miles pulled a face.
"Not really, it got
sort of complicated. Shit! The ice cream!" Miles said jumping up.
"What?"
"I left the ice
cream in the car! You said you wanted to
watch telly right? So I brought ice
cream."
"Oh you are too
good to be true! I'm sure it will be OK." Miles kissed me and then started to get
dressed.
"I'll be right
back," he said as he dashed out of the door. I smiled.
I couldn't believe my luck. Here
I was with a gorgeous new boyfriend, he had an amazing body, he was fantastic
in bed, he was totally in love with me, and he brought me ice cream! What could be more perfect than that? I threw on some clothes, turned on the TV and
sat waiting for Miles on the sofa with 2 spoons.
Miles must have run
all the way back up the stairs because he was out of breath when he let himself
back into my apartment.
"Cookie dough OK
with you?" he said holding out a family sized tub of Ben and Jerry's. My face lit up.
"My favourite!"
I said grinning.
"It's gone a bit
soft though," he said squeezing the tub.
I giggled.
"I kind of like
it that way," I smirked. So we
settled down for an evening of trashy telly, messily feeding each other half
melted ice cream. We didn't stop until
the whole tub was empty.
"I can't believe
we ate all that! Are you trying to make
me fat?" Miles wrapped his arms
around me.
"No, you're
perfect just the way you are Angel, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to get
off. My mum hates it when I get in late
on a work night."
"Your mum?"
I asked puzzled.
"Yeah, I know
it's sad, but I still live at home with her."
"No way! I thought you had your own place or
something?"
"Nah, can't
afford to move out. You'll have to come
over and meet her, she'll love you. Tell
you what, how about I pick you up at 6 tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow? Yeah, I suppose," I said. I suddenly felt a little scared about meeting
Miles's mum but I couldn't miss out on a chance to seeing him and I was a
little curious as to where he lived.
"It's a date
then!" said Miles kissing me goodbye.
I decided to get an
early night myself, it had been one hell of a weekend and there would be a lot
to do down in the record company office in the morning. I lay in bed thinking of Miles, he really
must be serious if he wanted to introduce me to his mum, then I thought about
my family. I'd have to tell them about
him sometime, but there was no rush.
